10/24/09 @ Legion of Doom, Columbus OH
Halloween cover show
*Infest, Project X, Jawbreaker, Delay (they MADE me sing Say Ave., I felt flattered/dumb)
Before leaving for the Peace Core, Dan left me a Halloween costume. It’s hand painted; the human skeletal structure; front and back of a black zip up hoodie. His work is admirable and impressive. The rule was if I wore it, I had to party. I had to do Dan justice. I’d have to start at a drunk charming and progress towards cannon balls full of rude remarks aimed at friends and or strangers. Then I’d have to do something people talked about for weeks. Something bad but something only Dan could get away with.
I didn’t wear it the first Halloween I had the chance to. Delay made a trip to Gainesville, FL to play Fest and I didn’t put it in the one bag I brought for the seventeen hour drive. I was thinking about playing and not about Halloween. I was thinking about the South’s boiled peanuts. The costume slipped my mind.
I wore Dan’s artistic achievement for the first time recently, on Oct 24th 2009. It was my costume for the annual Legion of Doom punk rock cover show. Infest. Misfits. Black Flag. Cocksparrer. Only posers don’t wear costumes so I needed to arrive in style. I found a little boys bike, 1 pedal and a broken seat, left by an old roommate. I rode to my friend Lindsey’s and she did a bang up make up job with a black eye pencil for a decent skeleton face. Then I rode off, the small bike and pedaling circumference making me look ridiculous. I got some choice compliments and some specific insults. I rode with a very serious un-dead face. I hid the bike in the tall weeds growing up around The Legion’s foundation. LOD is a booze free space and I respected that. Often times, I like going to shows there for that reason. I would have to prove my worth to the costume with some intense sober rocking out. I barely did any kind of rocking out compared to my usual. I did sing along to the Misfits and faked some words as well. I did get my pinky smashed between basement wall and falling PA speaker. Other than that, I was an observer for the night rather than a participant at the show; enjoying all the punker freaks a Columbus Halloween cover show brings out.
I left the show and went to Lindsey’s in the middle of an awe-inspiring Slayer set. There was a lights out dance party happening when I walked in. I watched it from the couch. I felt the costume writhe in disgust at my inability to have the wild fun it craved. Finally a Lauren Hill song came on and I stood up to jangle my bones. Ah yes, there it was. But I had danced the final dance. The music was done and a movie was to be watched. Ever After: A Cinderella tale featuring Drew Barrymore.
I sat down and drank my friend’s bf’s beer (thanks Steve), making comments through the whole movie. Dan always hates watching movies with me for this unshakable quality I seem to have. Everyone passed out before the end except me. My head bounced like the pumpkin carriage that never appeared in this lame version of a well known fairy tale. I fell asleep on the couch in the costume without a blanket. Some time amidst R.E.M, I resorted to a state of early puberty. I woke up and realized a slime on my upper right thigh. I had a wet dream. I don’t know or remember how or why. I think it was Drew Barrymore, or maybe that prince in his tights. I went to the bathroom and took off my boxers and shoved them in my old Chuck’s from 9th grade that I had taken off and left next to the couch. It was a contained blast so I put back on Dan’s costume. I couldn’t fall back asleep cause my naked belongings could feel the edges of stiff paint on the other side of the costume scraping them. I rode home at 6:30 in the morning. Some where along the way in my night, I lost a key I borrowed from a friend to get into their house to borrow a vacuum to clean up the forest floor of leaves that wound up in my house. I felt like a loser. Loser of keys, loser of party dignity. Sorry about the key Sam. Sorry about the costume Dan. Your expectations for me and your costume fell short. I’ll save the bones for another year. Maybe I’ll pass them on. I doubt anyone will want the pants though.